The Titan’s Bride
I grew up in his shadow
and as a girl
I worshipped him
from afar
and as I grew bolder
I would sit
for
hours
on a rocky outcropping
telling him the
secrets
of my
meager life
Honored that he
spoke to me!
and me alone
among all Humans
he spoke
to me!
Honored!
that’s how I
felt
and I loved him,
a
young girl
what did I know
I loved him
How could I know
what pain
Loved held
for me
in those mighty arms
How could I know
that those arms
that held up
The world
could never hold me
with such care
But I loved him
I loved him
because
he was
so alone
Loved him
because he stood
above all men
entrusted to hold
the celestial
heavens
and Earth
apart
Loved him
because he
held
us all from falling
And I loved him
because by
by acknowledging me
he lifted me up
above
all women
I was
exalted
the chosen on
It was as much my pride
as Loves
innocence
that led me
into his
tireless
arms
into his solitary world
that delivered me
into
this life
of torment
and
anguish
The betrothed
of
Atlas
The Bride
of
strength
and longing
but I was a
young girl,
a Shepard’s daughter
what did I
know
I
loved him
and lived in the stone cottage
the villagers built
for me
of the edge
of the ancient forest
that
grew up
around his feet
I danced and sang
among the dark
eternal pines
that sprang up
between his
toes
and
every day
I would climb
to the rocky
outcropping
and pass the time
in idle chatter
and
wishful
thinking
There was enchantment
enchantment
you can not
imagine
He saw everything
felt everything
heard
everything
as
if over centuries
the burden he
shouldered
had
become
his flesh.
He told me
of distant lands
of great
armies
marching
of leopards
stalking
gazelles
of
gleaming white cities
where women wore
silks
and
perfumes
tales of adventure
of daring
of the rise and
fall
of great men
and nations
he could see it all
he could
foretell things
every tremor
every wind
carried news
of storms
and droughts
or even of a sparrow
diving
to avoid
the hawk.
Can you imagine
knowing
all this?
yet he never
moved
and sometimes
for days
he
would be silent
as if somewhere
deep in the
bowels
of the earth
some great sorrow
moved unseen
by all but him.
But as
season
after season passed
I
grew weary
of my climb
up to
the outcropping
weary of my
empty house
and
empty arms
weary of his
immutable distance
Weary of his
damnable
sense of duty
that
kept him
standing there
day after day
night after night
Weary of this
empty honor
and I would climb
the
rock
shrieking into the wind
”Give it up
rest for
one night
no-one cares
no-one even knows you’re there
What about me
does my love mean nothing
come down to me
and rest”
But he
would say nothing
Sometimes he would
turn
his face away
when he saw me
and I would harangue him
all the more.
”Fool” I cried
”look at me
I grow old
in your
shadow
Can you not for
one moment
embrace
me
instead of all the world
a
world that has forgotten you
while I love you
unheld?”
The young Shepard boys
do not come anymore
at night
No- one comes
anymore
I have out lived
my children
outlived
any
living memory
of me
I grow
old
by degrees
more
subtle
than a tree
grows
But somehow
I cannot leave
him
as if
somehow loving him
has
bound me
to his fate eternally
As if his weight
has
become my own
and
I will not
can not
Throw it off.
So
sometimes I climb to the outcropping
sitting silent
watching him through the clouds
Or to simply watch
a sparrow
Fall.